


Just Another Day

by missbecky



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-05
Updated: 2014-09-05
Packaged: 2018-02-16 04:37:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2256138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missbecky/pseuds/missbecky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Peter is dismayed to learn that Yondu's bounty on him is still out there. Luckily for him, Rocket has a plan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Another Day

The first time it happened was annoying. The second time was a bit more worrisome. By the third time, Peter had had enough.

"What is it with people trying to kidnap me?" he shouted in exasperation.

They were on Tarthes, a planet perpetually locked in a harsh winter. No one had particularly wanted to come here, but the lure of doing away with another major tyrant, and more precisely, the reward money offered by the citizens, had been enough to convince them to give it a shot.

And to Peter's surprise, things had actually gone pretty well. Just another day being part of the legendary Guardians of the Galaxy, as he liked to say. (Sooner or later the name was going to catch on, he was sure of it.) 

They had done their job with minimal fuss – well, okay, so Rocket's tail was a little singed, but that was no big deal – and for that, they had received their just reward. Afterward, they had decided to spend some of said reward before they left the planet, going shopping at one of the bigger underground markets. And before Peter could even really get a good look at that new duster he had his eye on, someone had tried to throw a bag over his head.

It hadn't worked, of course. He had fought like crazy, and the other Guardians had chipped in, and eventually Drax had laid the would-be kidnapper out with a probably-permanent groove in his forehead. The local authorities had apologized profusely and offered them compensation for their troubles (hello, new duster), they had narrowly averted a diplomatic crisis involving raccoon bites on sensitive posterior areas, and then they had quickly left.

So in the end it had all turned out okay, but none of it answered Peter's question in the first place.

****

Rocket was the one who figured it out, about an hour after they had returned to the Milano and left the winterscape of Tarthes far behind. He was sitting behind Peter in the cockpit, humming a little as he whisked a paw over his computer, searching for some new job they might pick up.

"Holy shit!" Rocket's glee was unmistakable.

Those were never good words to hear when you were piloting a ship in outer space. Peter turned around quickly; in the co-pilot's seat, Gamora did the same. "What? What's going on?"

Rocket held up the computer screen, laughing. "I figured out why people keep trying to kidnap you, Quill."

Any relief Peter felt at hearing that he would soon have his answer was swiftly overridden by a growing worry over the way Rocket was laughing. They might not have been together as a group very long, but he already knew that no good came from hearing Rocket laugh like that.

"Well? What is it?" he demanded.

"It's you, dumbass!" Rocket said, still highly amused. "Yondu never rescinded the bounty he put out on you."

"Oh," Gamora said, very quietly.

"What the hell?" Peter exclaimed. He felt deeply offended. He supposed in hindsight that he should have checked on it, but he had always just assumed that Yondu had taken it back. Especially after the whole saving-the-entire-galaxy thing.

Some people were just so ungrateful.

"Maybe he didn't appreciate the way you screwed him over with the Infinity Stone," Rocket offered with a smirk.

"I'm sure he just forgot," Gamora said, rather stiffly.

Peter turned toward her, intending to thank her for her support – but then he saw the amusement in her eyes, and he realized the reason she sounded so uptight was because she was trying hard not to laugh.

"Oh, yeah," he grumped. "It's funny, ha-ha. You're not the one people keep trying to stuff in bags."

"And may I point out that to this day only Groot has succeeded in that regard," Rocket said. "You people don't appreciate him enough."

"Yeah, 'cause he really gets credit for that," Peter snapped. "And anyway, that isn't the point. The point is, I need to call Yondu and tell him to take it back."

"I really don't think you should do that," Rocket said.

Peter stared at him as if he'd grown a second head. "Why the hell not?"

"The bounty's still good," Rocket said. He looked at Gamora. "I think we should collect on it."

And Gamora, damn her soul, actually seemed to consider this. "We could use the money," she finally said.

"We are not doing this!" Peter said. He could hear the strident note in his voice, the one that said he was about half a second away from yelling. He could also hear a big speech taking shape in his head, something about so-called best friends and back-stabbers.

"Well, I think you should," Rocket said simply.

"What is happening?" Drax shouldered his way into the cockpit and stood beside Rocket's seat. He held the pot containing Groot, who was now nearly as big as a skinny, wooden shrub. The kind of shrub that grew around people's houses and never did anything like try to kidnap people and stuff them in bags.

"Nothing," Peter said with a glare at Rocket. He calculated the chances of shooting his way out of his predicament at 50/50. He could draw and take Rocket and Drax together with one shot, but Gamora would hand him his ass in the very next second. Not good odds. "Nothing is happening."

"Quill's missing out on the opportunity of a lifetime," Rocket said. 

"And what would that be?" Drax asked.

"Yondu's bounty is still out there. We could collect on it," Rocket said.

Drax mulled this over, and slowly began to nod.

Peter ignored him in order to focus on Rocket. "First off," he began, ticking off his points on his fingers, "Yondu will probably kill me on sight after the way we tricked him on Xandar."

"There was no 'we' in that," Gamora interrupted. "That was all you."

Peter sighed in exasperation. Loudly. " _Fine._ The way _I_ tricked him on Xandar. Saving the entire galaxy _again_ , I might add. 'Cause Yondu? Really not a good custodian for an Infinity Stone." He saw the way the other Guardians were looking at him, and he quickly got back to his original point. "Okay, and second? He knows who you are. He knows we're partners. He'll never believe that you captured me."

"Correction," Rocket said. "He knows we _were_ partners." A devilish gleam entered his eye. "Maybe we had a falling out. Did you ever think of that?"

"Forty thousand units is a lot of money," Drax observed.

"I am Groot," said Groot.

"I thought you weren't interested in money," Peter said. "Since when did you become so greedy?"

"I am not _greedy,_ " Drax retorted, somewhat aggrieved. "I have merely found that there are some items I wish to own, now that I see a future for myself beyond killing Ronan."

"Well, that's just great," Peter said, trying not to sound like a complete asshole as he said it. Because it really _was_ good that Drax had stopped living just for the sake of murdering someone. But did that epiphany have to come at his own expense? Seriously?

"We would never let any harm come to you," Gamora said. "You mustn't think that."

"Oh, I'm sure you wouldn't," Peter allowed, spreading his arms wide to show just how generous he thought they were all being. "But I'm still not going to be the bait just so you can get another measly 40k."

"Hmm," Rocket said as he tapped away at the computer. "I never figured you for the cowardly type."

Stung, Peter glared in his direction. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I believe it means he thinks you are a coward," Drax said, helpful as always.

"I'm not a coward!" Peter yelled, and yep, there it was, that annoying little crack in his voice when he got to shouting.

"No one is saying that," Gamora said calmly. "Are they?"

"I am Groot."

"I did not speak at all."

"Rocket?"

"Huh?"

"Rocket, you have something to say to Peter?"

"I do?"

"Yes," Gamora said with a firm glare. "You do."

"Ohhhh," Rocket said. "Yeah." He turned the computer around so Peter could see what was on the screen. "You're welcome."

Peter just stared, taken completely off guard. He glanced around at the other Guardians – Gamora still quietly amused, Drax stoic as ever, Groot a little bit anxious, Rocket smirking openly – and then back at the screen.

It was a list of open bounties in this quadrant of the galaxy. Notably missing was one for Peter Jason Quill.

"What…?" He knew he looked stupid when he was astonished, what with his mouth hanging open and all, but he couldn't help it. "What just happened?"

"I took care of that little bounty problem you had," Rocket said. He turned the computer around and started tapping away again. "Forty thousand units, mine all mine."

"Wait," Peter said, trying to catch up. He knew his translator implant was working just fine, but it still seemed like Rocket's words made no sense. "You did _what?_ "

"There is no bounty?" Drax frowned.

"Oh, there was a bounty all right," Rocket said. "And yours truly just collected it." He pointed a thumb at his chest, all puffed up with smug satisfaction.

And the other shoe finally dropped. Peter couldn't believe it. Couldn't believe that they had fooled him so well. Even worse, he couldn't believe he had actually fallen for it. "You guys were just messing with me?"

Gamora widened her eyes a little, doing a credible impersonation of his own "who me?" innocent expression.

Peter sighed. "This is payback, isn't it? All those metaphors, am I right?"

She gave him a little shrug that would have been cute at any other time. Like if it had been someone else's turn to be made fun of.

"How did you do that?" Drax asked Rocket.

"Easy," Rocket said. "I just transferred the funds from Yondu's account to mine. That's what it means to collect on a bounty, you know."

"I know what it means," Drax said irritably.

"Then why'd you ask?" Rocket said.

"I am Groot," put in Groot.

"Wait a second!" Peter said. He had to raise his voice a little to make sure he had everyone's attention. He felt dumb having to ask, but with these guys, it paid (literally) to be, well, literal. "So there was never any plan to turn me in to Yondu." He kept it from being a question only at the last minute, managing to salvage at least some of his tattered dignity.

"God, no," Rocket said, and he sounded genuinely offended. "Why would we do something stupid like that?"

"Because, because you…" Peter spluttered. He looked around, saw no help forthcoming from any of his friends, and gave up.

Beside him, Gamora gave him a look of mingled amusement and measured calm, like she was trying to figure out if he was really angry or not. Peter was glad that she felt comfortable enough with them to start developing a sense of humor, but he thought he would be even more glad when she turned it on someone other than him.

"I still would like to know how you were able to take that money from Yondu's account," Drax said.

"Oh, no you don't," Rocket said. "I'm not giving away my trade secrets."

"I am Groot," said Groot.

"You tell 'em," Rocket said. "But now that I _have_ the money, I get to figure out where to spend it."

Peter opened his mouth to respond, and for once, closed it before getting a single word out. All at once he decided it would be best to pretend the whole thing had never happened. So today it had been his turn to get teased. No big deal. Tomorrow it would be Drax's turn (again). Or better yet, Rocket. 

This was just how it was now, living with these amazing losers he called his friends.

"So where do you want to go?" he asked. He turned around, saw that thankfully the Milano had held course during all of this and that they weren't about to fly into a black hole, and let himself relax. "After all, we can go anywhere now that I don't have to worry about someone throwing a bag over my head."

"Says you," Rocket muttered.

Peter whipped around in his seat. "What was that?"

"Nothing," Rocket said, all perfect wide-eyed innocence.

Peter gave him a dirty look and turned around again. He reached for one of the Milano's controls, not because he needed to, but because after that little joke at his expense, he felt it was important to appear like he was in charge of things once again. 

Besides, this way it looked like he was busy flying the ship, not plotting a way to get even with Rocket, which hello, was totally his plan. He didn't have any of the details yet, but he _definitely_ had part of a plan.

Yep, it was just another day with the legendary Guardians of the Galaxy.


End file.
